Hey GMAT... stuff it.

So I took the GMAT last Saturday. Of course, it was the most beautiful day here. 75 degrees, sunny. Would have killed to be doing anything BUT taking the GMAT.

Getting into the GMAT testing center is like getting into Fort Knox. They take your picture, make you sign your life away, and scan your finger print about 300 million times. The only thing missing was a retina scan... But I'm sure they're installing that next month. And really, from the reception area to the testing area was a distance of about 2 feet. How could my smarter, better prepared, identical twin possibly have come in and taken my place in the time it took me to walk the two steps from the check in desk to the testing room in order to take the test for me and get a higher score? Honestly people. We're being a bit rediculous here.

Oh but before you can enter the test room that is 2 feet away, you must put all your stuff in a little locker. They even made me take my watch off. Because you never know! I might have made the world's tiniest cheat sheet and hidden it in my watch!!

So then you go in this room and there are little cubes with computers. They give you instructions on how to adjust the chair. And really, if you can't figure out how to adjust your chair, we should probably rethink business school.

First up is two essays. My first one was some bs about making a profit with the highest standards of ethics. It was ridiculous so of course I gave them bs right back. I don't even remember what the second one was but much bs was written for that too.

Then came the math. Oh how I loath math. I've hated it ever since the first person uttered 1+1=2 in kindergarten. But the questions they ask you on this test are like this:

A) x=a+b
B) y=x-a

What is the value of x?

1) you can answer with A only
2) you can answer with B only
3) you need both A and B to answer
4) you need A and B to answer but not both together
5) you need a partial lobotomy to answer

Who the hell cares what the value of x is? I sure don't. And no, I don't feel that my music degree has at all prepared me to answer what the value of x is. Thank you UConn.

Then comes the verbal part. Here you go, says GMAT. Read this exceedingly long and boring passage and then choose which one of these equally long and boring arguments would MOST weaken the argument in the passage IF it was true. Ok sure, why not? I've got nothing better to do today!

So... The cause for all this ranting? I didn't do very well. Big surprise. I think I did just as well on the SAT's. And the worst part is, after you answer the last question on the test, and you're all happy its over, and you're feeling pretty good about yourself?? They put your score right up there on the screen for you. So you can then drive immediately to the nearest McDonald's to drown yourself in a milkshake and fries that will blow your diet and make you feel even worse.

Thank goodness for the best husband ever and my 4 fuzzy kids. Nothing can cheer you up faster than a springer spaniel licking your face.

Next up... admissions essays.